Why is bondage so popular

Why is bondage so popular

Bondage is one of the most popular kinks, and certainly one of the best-loved components of the BDSM acronym. Whether you’re using rope, cuffs, under-the-bed restraints, or any other product in this category, bondage can be one of the simplest and most exciting ways to have some kinky fun. But what makes it so appealing for so many people? Here are some common reasons bondage enthusiasts like what they like…

Helplessness & submission

For people who are erotically inclined toward dominance and/or submission, bondage can be a more visible, tangible extension of the power exchange they already enjoy. When someone is in bondage, they’re at the mercy of their partner, a feeling that many submissives find titillating – just as their dominants adore the sense of control and free reign that tying up their sweetheart can give them.

Surrender & relaxation

There’s a common trope about sexual submissives: that they all have high-powered, stressful jobs, and that this is what causes them to crave delicious submission when the work day is over. While this obviously isn’t the case for all people on the submissive side of the spectrum, there’s some truth to the basic idea that deep surrender can be very relaxing. With the help of a trustworthy, competent partner, it can be blissfully stress-alleviating and cathartic to temporarily and consensually give up your ability to not only make decisions, but to move.

Reduced motion

There are also plenty of practical reasons you might want to tie someone down or otherwise restrain them during a kink scene. For example, if you’re doing wax play, electrostimulation, or other types of play that are somewhat risky and volatile, it can be in everyone’s best interest to put the receiver in bondage so they won’t be able to flail around and knock over a candle or slap the E-stim wand out of the giver’s hand. In this way, bondage has probably saved a lot of people from disastrous damage they may have incurred without it.

If you decide to try bondage for the first time, keep these simple safety tips in mind: establish a safeword beforehand, have a pair of scissors at the ready incase you need to cut someone free in a hurry, leave enough room to fit two fingers under each restraint to avoid cutting off someone’s circulation, and never leave a restrained person alone. With that advice under you’re belt, you’re well on your way to a delightful bondage scene!

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Kate Sloan is a journalist, blogger, podcaster, and educator who has been writing about sex online and in print for over five years. She writes about sex, kink, relationships, fashion, beauty, writing, and mental health. She has been voted a Kinkly.com Sex Blogging Superhero for four years running, and her words reach over 22,000 sex nerds, weirdos and queerdos every month. As a journalist and essayist, Kate has written for Glamour, Teen Vogue, Daily Xtra, the Establishment, Maisonneuve, Herizons, the Plaid Zebra, xoJane, and more.

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